Monthly Archives: January 2011

Mission 9.5 Report: Secret Zappas

Submitted by Professor Plum:

I combined two missions and celebrated the holiday season with a Secret Zappa gift giving session. In this interactive performance piece, I delivered gifts to random strangers in a highly theatrical manner.

My first step was to visit a dollar store with ten bucks in my pocket and spend it on anything that caught my eye. My acquisitions:

– playing cards with assorted vegetables on reverse
– balance bird
– kazoo
– bunny-ears headband
– box of colored pencils
– solar-powered dancing flower toy

Words can’t describe the final object in full splendor so I’ve included a photo:

My hope was that the gifts would be cute enough to mitigate the sketchiness of their delivery. The lackluster wrapping job certainly didn’t add to my credibility.

The final challenge was becoming Sir Secret Zappa himself. I wore fuzzy snowflake pants and a tight vest, carried an electric guitar, donned dark glasses, and messed up my hair as much as I could. Unfortunately, Zappa’s wild black mane and bushy moustache were too much. My budget didn’t allow for a trip to the costume shop. However, authenticity was not my goal. I feel that I captured the Zappadan spirit which lives in all of our hearts and I hope that came across.

To distinguish myself as more than just another crazy guy in a strange outfit handing out suspicious parcels, I blasted “Peaches en Regalia” from a portable amplifier ducttaped to my back and shouted Merry Zappadan as I was distributing the gifts. I still probably came across as crazy, but it was glamorous and certainly cemented my identity as Zappa.

I distributed the gifts to unsuspecting café patrons. I entered the café in an oversized peacoat to disguise myself and quickly surveyed the scene. After selecting my targets, I revealed my identity and fired up the soundtrack. I was afraid of being tossed out or reaching the end of the song so I only gave myself three minutes to distribute the gifts and make my escape. It was a rush but I managed to unload all the goods. I gave the final gift to a barista on the way out.

The audience reaction was a mix of confusion and surprise but I think they appreciated it and I earned smiles and blushes from my targets. Everybody stopped what they were doing to watch and I noticed a few people taking photos or videos on their phones. I imagine it took a while for the shock to wear off and for the full impact of my performance to sink in, but I suspect that everybody was discussing it long after I left.

I didn’t want to ruin the moment by asking somebody to send me a photo so I don’t have much documentation of the performance. I had recruited a friend to film the episode but he bailed at the last minute and, since it was already the last day of Zappadan, I had to go solo. Nevertheless, I had a lot of fun, and might try it again with a video crew. Zappadan is a long way off but some speculate that on February 2nd the prophet will stir from his annual hibernation to relieve himself in the yellow snow, take medication for his hibernal hangover, and search for his shadow which, according to rumor, exists only in the fourth dimension. Perhaps he’ll hand out a few presents while he’s at it!

Mission 7 Reports: The Tea Party Four Freedoms

Submitted by Bengar:

“Norman Rockwell is known for a series of paintings called The Four Freedoms. Few know that he has also recently been aiding The Tea Party with a new campaign expressing a new four freedoms:”

Mission 9 Report: Zappa Penny and Other Year-End Miracles

This year, like every year, we at Art Art Revolution celebrated Zappadan (see Mission 9: Zappadan!)

Check back next week for some Zappa inspired art. For now, we’ll just mention some of the Zappadan miracles and Art Art Revolution events that occured this Zappadan season, including finding this Zappa penny at a Maryland rest stop.

If you aren’t familiar with Zappadan miracles, they are similar to Christmas miracles, but they happen during the Zappadan season (Dec 4th-Dec 21st) rather than on Christmas.

Besides finding the Zappa penny, I count this season’s personal Zappadan miracles as finding my lost watch (somehow, Zappa always seems to bring me back lost items) as well as surviving my last statistics class of grad school and also surviving visits to various relatives. Also, I produced a compelling Zappa poster for Mission 9: Zappadan! which I will post next week.

Most significantly, I ran into a friend of mine from grad school while on a train from Portland to Seattle. Pretty significant, since neither of us live in either city. Not only were we on the same train, we were in the same train car.

Our good friend Jonathan Nakatamo writes in to tell us that to Celebrate Zappadan he performed Vox Balaenae twice, began work on an epic song cycle called “Life Science”, watched the Star Wars Holiday Special and lived to tell the tale, and received 30 free Nantucket Nectars. Parrotchute reports that she found her lost bracelet, thanks to Zappa’s help. Do you have a Zappadan miracle to share? If so, let us know!

In other AAR news, we received several reports of the “Cher the Road” sign featured in this public art feature. We also have reports that the Georgetown Career Center is still enthusiastically advertising for Kaplan Test Prep.

Ok, that’s all for now, revolutionaries. Check back next week when we’ll start posting more mission reports, and will also post a new mission.

Happy New Year!

Welcome back revolutionaries! Although the Revolution never sleeps, both of the site’s moderators have been traveling recently. Over the next few days, check back for updates on mission reports, artistic events, a new mission and a slight tweak to our formatting.